On gift giving.

How much of this could be avoided by better communication on the part of the woman and better paying of attention on the part of the man? And why don’t the people who write this editorial every year ever talk about that?

You know those television ads where a ruggedly handsome guy springs a diamond ring on his gorgeous wife? And her face crumples with joy? Pure fantasy. Most males are hopelessly, appallingly, terrifyingly clueless when it comes to finding an acceptable gift. Just ask any woman.

Yawn. I guess I’m lucky that way, because I didn’t have to guess what Sabra wanted. I knew what she liked, because, well…she told me. And I paid attention and kept all of it in mind when I went shopping for her gifts. And guess what? She loved everything I got for her. Funny how that works, isn’t it?

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One Response to “On gift giving.”

  1. southtexaspistolero Says:

    mike w. (64.206.252.211)
    If you tell us what you want you can’t be disappointed.

    The best way for a woman to get a gift they want from me is to tell me exactly what they want.

    How hard is that?
    December 23, 2009, 9:03:20 AM CST – Like – Reply – Edit – Moderate

    the pistolero (68.203.231.7)
    Not hard at all, my friend, not hard at all.
    December 23, 2009, 9:06:14 AM CST – Like – Reply – Edit – Moderate

    Sabra (66.69.91.35)
    If you tell us what you want you can’t be disappointed.

    This is not quite true. There was the Christmas I made my ex-husband a list that included pictures, prices, and stores, and got something completely random.

    Many (if not most) women would prefer not to have to say outright what they want–which opens up for all sorts of error. A lot of guys seem to want to fill a perceived need, which is admirable but usually too practical to suit a woman. Gift guides like this err in assuming all women and all men are the same–I rather like the eminently practical fireproof box Erik gave me, thankyouverymuch.

    Any woman who would maintain a Very Wrong Gift Hall of Fame and continuously remind her husband of a screw-up like that should probably be slapped. I used that damned USS Boise beer stein until one of the kids knocked it over & broke it.
    December 23, 2009, 9:38:31 AM CST – Like – Reply – Edit – Moderate

    Bob S. (209.12.109.210)
    Many (if not most) women would prefer not to have to say outright what they want-

    It isn’t necessarily about spelling or saying outright what you want but establishing what is considered acceptable or not for you.

    I’m a very lucky man. My wife learned from a friend that “disappointment is caused by unmet expectations” and she’s used that every since.

    Let the person know what type, approximate cost, what you prefer (clothes – jeans not okay but sweaters are).

    The other aspect is if the person asks “What do you want” be honest. Women are worse at this then men sweeping generalization – I know but none the less true.

    How often do you hear men say “don’t bother getting me anything” then are upset when they don’t get anything?
    December 23, 2009, 11:12:53 AM CST – Like – Reply – Edit – Moderate

    Sabra (66.69.91.35)
    It isn’t necessarily about spelling or saying outright what you want but establishing what is considered acceptable or not for you.

    Excellent point. I would far rather maintain the element of surprise myself. This is where the woman giving guidelines and the guy paying attention come into play. Absent either one of those things, there is trouble to be had.
    December 23, 2009, 12:18:40 PM CST – Like – Reply – Edit – Moderate

    Scott (66.226.243.10)
    A) Did you find that newspaper on a park bench or did you actually pay for it? And if you say you read it online, why in the world would you waste your time?

    Onward to B) Never let it be said that women are any kind of of unerring gift givers. It works both ways. Men are generally relentlessly practical, and can find some use for the useless gift, and therefore we don’t sit around maoning in the newspaper about it.

    [ducking now, and Merry Christmas, yall!]
    December 23, 2009, 6:02:07 PM CST – Like – Reply – Edit – Moderate

    the pistolero (68.203.231.7)
    Many (if not most) women would prefer not to have to say outright what they want–which opens up for all sorts of error.
    I understand where you’re coming from, Sabra. I remember you only gave me that one specific idea, but you did give me more general guidelines as well. I’m glad you did too.

    And if you say you read it online, why in the world would you waste your time?
    HA! Well, it didn’t take THAT long. And sometimes wasting time is good for blog posts. Merry Christmas to you, Scott.
    December 24, 2009, 7:41:33 AM CST – Like – Reply – Edit – Moderate

    Sabra (66.69.91.35)
    Men are generally relentlessly practical, and can find some use for the useless gift

    It wouldn’t surprise me at all, Scott, if women are much more prone to buying useless gifts than men are. Thankfully, the Pistolero is remarkably easy to buy for. I just need ask myself one question–Can this be used as a weapon?
    December 24, 2009, 9:28:59 AM CST – Like – Reply – Edit – Moderate

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