Posts Tagged ‘things my wife says’

Overheard, on the way home from Central Market…

August 7, 2011

…as we ride by the McCombs Center on the campus of the University of the Incarnate Word…

Me: “Didn’t Red McCombs want to move the Minnesota Vikings to San Antonio once upon a time?”

Sabra: “Yes. That’s why he bought them, as I recall, but the NFL wouldn’t let him…the NFL’s really got a hard-on for San Antonio. They’d fuck us, but it would be a hate-fuck.”

Me: “HAHAHAHAHAAAA!”

Well, I can’t argue that.

July 14, 2011

Me, after some thought, as I bring Sabra some Diet Coke: “Even Scott Stroud, of all people, agreed with the Supreme Court’s ruling in Heller v. D.C.! Seriously, how whacked-out do you have to be to be to the left of Scott Stroud?”

Sabra: “Scott Stroud’s an ass, but he is at least capable of logical thought. The same cannot be said of ole Ricky.”

Sabra: *fart*…”That was my ass weighing in on this. Even my ass makes more sense on Second Amendment issues than he (O. Ricardo Pimentel) does. And you can quote me on that.”

So I did. 😉

Melted WHAT?

April 19, 2011

Context: Sabra made chalupas for dinner.

Overheard, just now…

Me: “Was dinner good?”

Sabra: “Beans and melted cheese on tortillas, how could it NOT be good? Oh, wait, I’ve had SAISD chalupas before.”

Me: “Mystery beans?”

Sabra: “Pretty much. Fried tortillas,  cheese-like substance, smegma…that’s it! Melted smegma!”

Oh, Lord, I’m dyin’ over here. I needed that, especially after the last 36 hours or so.

Overheard, walking to the Tower of the Americas…

March 21, 2011

…last Friday evening, as I was musing on going up in the CN Tower in Toronto some 15 years ago, which was the last time I was in anything like the TotA…

My mother, on the CN Tower: “It’s taller?”

Me: “Yeah, just a little over 1800 feet. The observation deck is about 1500 feet up.”

Sabra: “Well, it’s smaller with the exchange rate.”

Me, larfing and larfing: “That is SO going on the blog when we get home!”

Well, it would have, but I am just now remembering it. 😉

The Tower of the Americas was pretty cool, though. I’d love to go back and get pictures.

I’ve heard variations of this before…

February 8, 2011

…but it’s still funny…

Me: I’m just as clumsy as I can be tonight.”

Sabra: “We’ll be having apples and cheese after the kids go to bed!”

Me: “How’s that going to help me being clumsy?”

Sabra: “Ohhh, I thought you said hungry! Well, we’ll fill up that gimp leg yet.”

Indeed we will…

It’s funny ’cause it’s true.

February 2, 2011

Me, looking over Sabra’s shoulder at the baby: “She’s out like a light! She’s like, ‘Cold? Meh.'”

Sabra: “No. No, she is out like one of those trick birthday candles!”

Me, laughing hysterically: “That is SO my next blog post!”

And so it is. 😉

Overheard on the West Side…

January 21, 2011

…earlier this afternoon, specifically Henry’s Puffy Tacos on Bandera Road just outside Loop 410, as Justin Moore’s “Small Town U.S.A.” was playing…

Sabra: “I wonder if I can shove a jalapeno in my ear and make myself go deaf. Or maybe I could drink enough Shiner Bock to make this sound like Jamey Johnson.”

I’d guess there’s not enough Shiner Bock beer in Texas to make Justin Moore sound that good, but then that’s just me. And really, guys, the new country channel on Sirius? Why the hell couldn’t you have it on The Roadhouse?

Other than that, though…yummy. I had never heard of puffy tacos before I met Sabra, but man, I was missing out. And the bean-and-cheese nachos were to die for. I’d only had puffy tacos once before today that I remember, at (I think) El Tipico, on Rigsby Avenue just inside Loop 410, and they were good then too! Man alive, but East Texas was just way too white…though the fresh Gulf seafood I had in Southeast Texas was pretty good…

Why yes, yes we can.

January 3, 2011

Context: I am talking to the baybeh.

Me: “I love you, pretty girl! You’re growing up way too fast, you know it?”

Sabra, winking and grinning: “That’s okay, we can have another one.”

Indeed we can, sweet wife, indeed we can. 😉

Hoo-boy, good thing I had an empty mouth…

December 23, 2010

…just a second ago, as I was reading the comments to Sabra’s latest

“‘Fruit fly’. I like that term.”

“Yeah. I’ve been told I’m too pretty to be a fag hag.”

ROTFLMAO. Yes, indeed…

Naming the kittehs

December 17, 2010

Sabra, just a few minutes ago:

“I just remembered something completely random. My brother has a white cat and he named it Cracker.”

Me, laughing: “That sounds just like something YOU would name a cat!”

Her: “Oh hell no, I’d name it Honky.”

Me: larfing my ass off.

God, but I love that woman.